Sunday, September 28, 2008

Got Talent? Not Quite.

One of my goals for this year
is to develop a talent.
I was hoping that cake decorating
might be it
since my daughter had invited me
to take a cake decorating class with her.
However,
today I can almost certainly say,
nope,cake decorating is definitely
not one of my talents.

Today's class we were learning
to make frosting roses.
We had to make the centers
of the roses ahead of time
so the girls and I got together
on Thursday and made centers.
Mine left quite a lot to be desired,
but hey, I tried
and I did miss class last week
where the instructors taught
how to make the centers
so I was at a disadvantage.

Today we made our cakes
and all the frosting
and went to class.

I was less than sucessful.

The center is placed
on a piece of wax paper
which is stuck to the flower "nail"
with frosting.
Then you roll the nail,
and make the "rainbow" loops
and a beautiful rose appears.
At least that is what
is suppose to happen.
Every time I would finally get
what somewhat resembled a rose forming,
my flower would fall off the wax paper
and land in a pile of frosting
on the floor.
Every time!!
It was very frustrating.

Finally the instructor decided
that my frosting was too thick
and we thinned it out
and it worked a little better.
Then it only fell on the floor
every other time.
Except then my frosting
was too thin to hold it's shape
and my roses
looked a little wilted.

This is the oldest daughter's cake.
See her beautiful roses?
Well done daughter!


Here is the other daughter's cake.
She is the cake decorating natural.
She makes rose construction look easy
and she's also great at shell borders and dots.
You go girl!


Here are my wilted roses.
They don't look horrible,
but considering I made about 25
and this is what I have to show for it,
I was less than pleased.
Thanks to daughter #2
for the lovely shell decoration
around the base.
By the time I got the roses on
I was too frustrated
to attempt anything else.
I do have to say that
leaves may be my strong point.
Look at those exceptional leaves.

So what if I can't make
great frosting roses.
No one likes to eat them anyway.

Today I am thankful that

I don't have to make another batch of frosting, bake another cake, or go to another cake decorating class unless I want to.
I have daughters and adopted daughters to go to the General Women's broadcast with me.
I belong to the Relief Society.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Emily's Ice Cream

One of the little girls in the class where my oldest son works as an instructional assistant has Batten disease. This is a rare, inherited disease of the nervous system. She was fine until she was 4 years old when she began to lose her eyesight. She is now blind, has daily brain seizures and has difficulty retaining information. This disease becomes progressively worse, leading to death,
usually before the age of 20.

Because she has a fatal disease Make-A-Wish has granted several of Emily's wishes. One of her wishes was to swim with the dolphins and another one was to be able to create her own Cold Stone Creamery Ice Cream Creation.

Last night was the unveiling of Emily's Creation at an Ice Cream Social at Cold Stone. The sons and the oldest daughter went to support Emily and to try out her ice cream. She had Nutter Butter Ice Cream mixed with Yellow Cake, Kit Kats, and White Chocolate Chips. My sons enjoyed the combination but the daughter deemed it just OK. I felt kind of bad that I didn't get to try it, but I am still striving to be good on my elimination diet. Well, today the oldest son came home from school with a half gallon of Emily's Creation. One of the other instructional assistants had bought it and a half gallon of Jack's Creation for all the kids in the class to try. They don't have that many kids in their class, so there was a lot left over. The other teachers were going to throw the left over away, but when the son discovered that it had cost $11.oo for each container he decided it wasn't going into the trash.

Well, I really like Emily and I really wanted to try her creation and since it was a limited thing I knew I would never have another chance so I gave in and had a spoonful of the ice cream.

I'm sorry Emily, but that is the nastiest stuff I have ever tasted. Oh Yuck! It was so not worth it. 2 weeks and 5 days of total adherence to my diet and then Yuck, Yuck, Yuck!

Now Jack's Creation on the other hand, Marshmallow ice cream with Oreos, Chocolate Chips and Fudge, I would have liked another bite of it. I don't know Jack but he can make ice cream for me anytime. Yum!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Cloud 9

Well, I climbed back into an airplane today,
on my way home to Arizona,
even though I'm still not sure
how they manage to stay up in the air
and then come down safely.

My son-in-law told me to imagine a hurricane.
He said, "It's not just the air
that does the damage
but the speed of the wind
that makes a hurricane so strong,
strong enough to even lift whole houses
off the ground.
Now an airliner going 4 to 5 times
faster then a hurricane
has no problem staying off the ground
being lighter then a house,
most of the time."
I think this was meant to be comforting,
and reassuring, but it really wasn't.
Perhaps my son-in-law doesn't like me
and was hoping to get rid of me
by causing me to have a heart attack.
I mean, I've seen what kind of devastation
Hurricane Katrina left in her wake
as well as Hurricane Ike just recently.
I don't like the picture of my airplane
being tossed around in a hurricane and
then dropped when the wind speed slows down.
Also what about that last sentence,
"most of the time."
What happens during the other times?
Said son-in-law is studying to be a pilot
and actually just got his pilot's license
so he must know what he is talking about,
but I still don't seem to catch the vision.

Oh well,
enough of that since I obviously landed safely
or I wouldn't be here posting this blog.

Today I was again reminded
of how much I enjoy looking out the window
of an airplane at the ground below.
On recent flights, for some reason,
I have opted to sit in the aisle seat
and haven't had the opportunity to
gaze out on the terrain as it passes by.
I have been missing out.
I spent almost all of my flight today
staring out the window,
admiring the scenery,
and trying to see how many
landmarks I could recognize.
I was amazed at how many
I could actually pick out.
The Grand Canyon being the easiest, of course.
Toward the end of the journey
we ran into some large patches
of white, fluffy clouds.
They looked so soft and substantial
and I could just imagine snuggling down into one.


For some reason they reminded me
of the idiom, "On Cloud Nine".
I started trying to determine
which cloud was cloud 9
and if it would look different
than any of the other clouds.

When I was an instructional assistant
at an elementary school close to my home,
one of the Kindergarten classes,
that I would often visit,
got a group time rug
with the alphabet and numbers on it.
Each letter of the alphabet was
written around the outside
and the numbers - 1 to 10 -
were each written on a cloud.
The first time I visited
after the carpet arrived
I informed all the children
that "Cloud 9" was my special cloud.
I told them it was my happy spot.


After that, whenever I would drop in,
they would clear my space and
demand that I sit there,
as only a 5 year old can do.
Then they would all anxiously ask,
"Do you feel happy now"?

Today I could picture myself
all wrapped up in one of those
soft, fluffy marshmallow clouds
feeling very, very relaxed
and very, very happy.

So, I'm sure you are all
as curious as I was to find out
where the phrase "On Cloud Nine",
which means to be
in a state of blissful happiness,
originated.
A commonly heard explanation
is that the expression originated
as one of the classifications of clouds
which were defined by the US Weather Bureau
in the 1950s, in which 'Cloud Nine'
denotes the fluffy cumulonimbus type
that are considered so attractive.
Wow! That means all the clouds
I saw were Cloud Nines.
Another explanation is that the phrase
derives from Buddhism
and that Cloud Nine is one of the stages
of the progress to enlightenment
of a Bodhisattva ( one destined to become a Buddha).

Neither of these explanations holds water,
(unlike clouds which often do hold water.)

To begin with,
both the cloud classifications
and the Buddhist stages to enlightenment
have ten levels.
To single out the last but one stage of either
is rather like attributing the source
of the 'whole nine yards' to American Football,
where it is ten yards rather than nine
that is a significant measure.
Also, the fact that nine
is far from the only number
that has been linked with clouds,
argues against those origins.
Early examples of 'cloud' expressions
include clouds seven, eight, nine
and even thirty-nine.
Thirty-nine? That must be
super duper happy!
It seems that it is the clouds themselves,
rather than the number of them,
that were in the thoughts of those
who coined this phrase.
The imagery was originally
of a 'cloud cuckoo land'
or 'head in the clouds' dreaminess,
induced by either intoxication or inspiration,
rather than the 'idyllic happiness'
that we now associate with the phrase.
The early references
all come from mid 20th century USA.
The early favourite was 'cloud seven'
and many of the oldest citations use that form,
as in this piece
from The Dictionary of American Slang, 1960,
which was the first printed definition of the term
"Cloud seven -
completely happy, perfectly satisfied;
in a euphoric state."
This early preference for seven
as the significant number
may have been influenced
by the existing phrase 'seventh heaven'.
Since the 1980s or so, 'cloud nine'
has become predominant.

Now wasn't that informative?
Apparently we cannot be ecstatically happy
without the help of alcoholic beverages.
I think I beg to differ with that assumption.
I have managed to be extremely happy
sans booze on more than one occasion.
But hey, now we have all learned
something new today.

Today I am thankful for

a sister to drive me to the airport and take care of my mom.
my own home.
the break I had from the HOT September temperatures. It was a "comfortable" 106 degrees today according to our pilot.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Canyon Colors

My mom kept telling me that I needed to do something fun before I went home. She seems to think that all I have done while I was here is work. I don't feel like I have worked very hard. I have done my fair share of laundry and I have cooked a few meals, but I'm not sure that constitutes hard work. The washing machine basically does the work for me and cooking isn't bad at all when the recipients are appreciative.

Since today'was my last day in Utah I had to decide what fun thing I wanted to do. I chose to go on an Autumn leave hunt up the canyon. My mom and my sister decided they could handle that much fun so they accompanied me. My hunt was sucessful and I had lots of fun!

These leaves were just as we entered Payson canyon, pretty close to home. More evidence that Fall is quickly approaching.

This picture was taken from the trailhead to the Grotto, where our family went hiking when we were in Utah this summer. I didn't do any hiking, but I did get out to take a few pictures. We were all surprised that the quaking Aspens, at the top of the mountain, were all still green. There were a lot more colored leaves down lower than there were up high.

My mom has a Fall screen saver on her computer with beautiful yellow trees lining both sides of the road and piles of yellow leaves on the ground. I told her that that was what I was looking for before we left home. These leaves weren't quite as abundant as the ones on her computer, but it was still a very pretty scene. I took this picture in Santaquin Canyon on the way down.

It's a good thing I wasn't trying to do any real hunting on this drive. The deer kept disappearing before I could get my camera situated to "shoot" them. I could have picked off a lot of grazing cows, but I don't think their owners would have appreciated that too much.

I loved being able to actually see Autumn leaves for a change. It was a beautiful and fun trip, much better than cooking or doing laundry.

Today I am thankful for

the time I have been able to spend with my mom and other family members for the past 10 days.
my mom's recovery - even though it is progressing slower than she would like.
people that appreciate my cooking.

Eeewww! Gross!

Something I saw today brought back
a vivid memory from my childhood.


I have already shared with you
my friendship with the neighbor's cows
and yes, they were black and white
like this one,
only a little less black
and a little more white,
but the cow isn't what my memory was about.
See that small reddish colored rock
in the bottom right hand corner?
For those of you who don't know
that is called a salt rock or salt lick.
It is a rock that contains salt crystals
and it got it's other name from the fact
that the cows lick it
to increase their salt intake.
What I remembered is that the cows
weren't always the only ones doing the licking.
I can very clearly remember
the salt taste on my tongue.
What was I thinking???
Why would I lick that rock
that cows had also been licking??
I'd like to think that it was a dare
from a mean older brother,
but I'm pretty sure that it wasn't.
I seem to remember I just liked the taste.
I got licked by the calves often enough
that I probably felt that I had been
exposed to enough cow slobber
and had built up an immunity.
But, if the cow tongues aren't gross enough
it also appears to me that there was
plenty of cow dung to be had in those licks too.
Eeww! Gross!
This gives new meaning
to the word
COWLICK!

Monday, September 22, 2008

Unwelcome News

My mom had a follow-up appointment with her doctor today to have some of her stitches taken out, her catheter removed (hooray!) and to get the results from the tests on her lymph nodes. The good news was that 9 out of 10 of her lymph nodes were cancer free. The bad news was that one of the lymph nodes had a cancerous tumor in it, which means that she will need to start radiation treatment as soon as she is completely healed from the surgery. She will probably be having radiation 5 days a week for 6 to 8 weeks, but not until at least November.

This was not the news we had been hoping to hear, but we are grateful that there are medical procedures that can hopefully stop the progression of the cancer in her body.

Perhaps I'll get to come back to Utah to welcome in Winter as well as Fall.

The Arrival of Fall

I have to say that I was a little disappointed when I arrived in Utah last week and it wasn't nearly as Fall like as I had been expecting. In Arizona we have been dreaming of the days when the high temperature will finally fall below 90 degrees and praying that it is just around the corner. Autumn decorations keep popping up on the blogs of friends and acquaintances in Maricopa county wishfully encouraging some hope for relief.

Not so in Utah. Although the temperatures are already below ninety here these Utahns seem to be holding on to Summer with all they've got. I have seen a lot more 4th of July decorations still gracing the doors of neighborhood homes than the traditional pumpkin and scarecrow adornments of Autumn and there was nary a colored leaf on the mountains last Sunday as I was driven south from the airport. I guess these residents realize that after Fall quickly comes Winter and they are not quite ready to welcome that with open arms.

However, I was ecstatic this morning, the official first day of Fall, to wake up to overcast skies and a decidedly crisp feel to the air. If I look really hard at the mountain behind my mom's house I can even pick out scatterings of red leafs finally appearing.

Fall is Here!
On my morning walk (which required a jacket for the first time since I've been here) I was excited to see more evidence of the changing seasons.
Raindrops falling gently on my head,
a few leaves beginning to change color and a brave soul acknowledging that Autumn is upon us by decorating a grave with a harvest flair.
Welcome Autumn.
I wish I could stick around to enjoy all you have to offer.
Today I am thankful for
the opportunity to get to see the changing seasons first hand.
A sister to come and spend time with my mom and me.
the need for a jacket.

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Breaking Dawn

Well, I can now say I read it.
I can't say I loved it
but I won't say I hated it.
I guess I feel o.k. about how things ended up
for Jacob as well as Bella and Edward.
My advice to you though
is don't read this book
when you are emptying lymph node fluid
from your mother's lymph node drains.
It is way too unsettling.

Friday, September 19, 2008

My Mom's Flowers

My mom has always worked hard
to have a garden or 2 or 3 of beautiful flowers.
At our house on the hill in Heber
my mom had rock gardens
full of pretty flowers
tucked in beds
surrounded by rocks
hauled from the hot pots
in nearby Midway.
Every evening she would go outside
and water her flowers.
I think this was her quiet time.
Her time to think and
to appreciate the fruits of her labors.
At the time I didn't really understand
what she found so enjoyable about
standing over the garden
with a hose every night
but now I think I am
beginning to figure it out.
It's nice to look at something
you have created
from almost nothing
and see it flourish.
It's rewarding to be a part of
making Heavenly Father's world
a more beautiful place.

My mom is a good example to me
of being creative and
making her little corner of the world
a nicer place.
Even though she doesn't feel good
most of the time
she keeps busy sewing
or quilting
or crocheting
or knitting
or doing geneology.
After her surgery
the nurse's instructions
from the doctor were
"Don't just lay in bed
all the time"
so she is adamate that she
needs to be up and doing something.
Although I think it is o.k.
to act sick for a little while
following cancer surgery
I do admire her for her detemination
to not let this bump in the road
keep her from accoplishing
the things she desires.


I could learn a lot from her.
Perhaps I'll go home and
plant a Fall garden.

Today I am thankful for

a mom who is a good example to me.
happy childhood memories.
A new baby boy in the family born to my niece yesterday.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

The Waiting Game

Today my mom had her surgery. She got up early and was ready to go by 8:00 AM and then we had to come up with something to do until it was time to drive across the street to the hospital for her 10:30 scheduled arrival time. She couldn't even use up some time eating breakfast since she had to fast. Just when we were getting tired of staring at each other my brother and my sister-in-law (my other brother's wife) arrived to give us someone new to look at. They had decided they wanted to hear what the doctor had to say and they also didn't want me to be waiting all alone. I appreciated their support and I'm sure mom did too.

When we arrived at the hospital they went to the waiting area and I stayed with mom to get all the paperwork filled out and the last minute tests conducted. Then we were escorted back to a curtained off cubicle and a reclining hospital chair to wait for it to be mom's turn. We waited and waited and waited. We talked about everything we could think of to talk about. We analyzed the interior decorating. We were fans of the clouds painted on the florescent light covers, but weren't at all sure that the fire engine red outlet covers went with the color scheme. We tried to decide if they glowed if the power went out, but then we decided it really wasn't important to know where the outlets were if you didn't have any electricity. We discussed the merits of hospital gowns and fuzzy socks. We tried to guess how much a hospital gown designer gets paid. I read the Outdoor Life magazine and learned that the life span of a frog can be as long as 39 years. Finally my mom's doctor and the oncologist who was assisting him dropped in to explain what they were going to do and to tell her the operating room was almost ready and then we waited some more. About noon they finally wheeled my mom to surgery and I went to the waiting room to wait some more.

Waiting made us all hungry so we decided to visit the hospital cafeteria for lunch. We all had turkey and I had a baked potato with mine. It was actually very good hospital food. Then we went back to wait a while longer. The doctor came out about 2:30 to tell us that the surgery and had gone well and what they had done and what to expect. He showed us with his hands the size of the patch of skin and tissue they had removed. It was about the size of a checkbook box. I'm not sure where they found that much flesh to cut out. He said they would keep mom until she was alert and then they would move her to her room on the 2nd floor. He told us to go upstairs in about an hour so we waited some more in the waiting room and then we headed for the elevator. The sign in the elevator said that the 2nd floor was Labor and Delivery and we weren't sure that was where my mom was really going to show up, but we got off and asked the nurses and they assured us that we were in the right place. They directed us to her room and we waited some more. About 4:00 my mom arrived in her room and we spent the next couple of hours listening to the alarms go off on her monitor while they tried to get her oxygen level and blood pressure stabilized and she tried to get comfortable with her entire body tied up to various machines and tubes.

My hand holders left about 6:30 or 7:00 and I went and bought my mom her fresh raspberry shake (which was her reward for being a good girl all day). We are grateful that our family has strong stomachs and don't throw up following surgery. The nurse told her she could have the shake once we were sure she could hold down food and she was anxious to get it after her not so delicious dinner of beef broth, herbal tea, water and a protein juice drink.

It was a long day of waiting but things seemed to go well and hopefully the problem is taken care of. Now we just have to wait for the report on the lymph nodes. More waiting.

Today I am thankful for

skilled doctors who can remove cancer from our bodies.
a brother and sister-in-law to keep me company and buy me lunch.
other people's opinionated kids who remind me that mine are normal.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

The Grass is Always Greener...


When I went on my walk today I saw these two horses that made me laugh. They were standing in a field full of tall green grass that to me looked like pretty great horse food, yet they both had their heads stuck through the fence and their necks extended as far as they could reach eating the grass mixed in with the weeds at the side of the road.

Silly Horses!

A lot of times I am just like those horses. I think that something that is just out of my reach looks so much better and would make me so much happier than something similiar that is more available.

Like at a thrift store. The items that are already in someone else's cart are usually "Just what I would like". I always wish that I had found them first.

Why do we feel that way? Some people would probably call it human nature but obviously it isn't just human nature. These horses felt the same way.

Monday, September 15, 2008

The Fruits of Fall

What a wonderful time of year to get to come to Utah! Today mom and I took a ride out to Santaquin and visited a few fruit stands. I bought some apples and peaches and nectarines that were probably growing on the tree yesterday. Then we drove out to Genola and behind West mountain to see all the fruit orchards and the trees still laden with fruit. We followed a tractor pulling a wagon full of peaches to the stand for a couple of minutes. I feel bad for city kids that think that fruit just comes from a store.

When we got back to mom's house I went out in her back yard and picked some tomatoes and some summer squash out of her tiny garden. Yum! Yum! Eating what I'm suppose to on my diet is going to be so much easier with all this bounty. I am so blessed.

Cemetery Thoughts

When I visit my mom I usually
take my daily walk in the Payson cemetery.

I really like walking in cemeteries.
They are peaceful and quiet
and there's not too much traffic
to have to watch out for.

Cemeteries are also a good place to think.
To reflect on what is important in life.
To ponder on what lasts and what doesn't.
To appreciate how blessed I am
to live in a time
where my children outliving me
is a good possibility.

This row of graves is a sad reminder
that this wasn't always the case.
In her 53-year lifetime this mother
buried 6 children under the age of 1
and another child at 15.

Cemeteries are good places to remember
my ancestors and the choices they made
and the impact those choices
have had on my life.

Cemeteries bring to mind questions
about what I value in life
and where my focus is and
what symbol could or would
be put on my tombstone
to represent me and my interests.


I like tombstones.
I like how firm and permanent they appear.
I like how they remind me of
the walls of the temple
and the covenants and promises
that are made there.
Promises that assure me
that death is not the end
and that I can be with my family again
even though circumstances
may separate us for a time.

I also enjoy the lighter side of cemeteries.
How it seems that some names
were created solely for the purpose
of being engraven on a tombstone.


Today I am thankful for

60 degree temperatures at 10:00 AM.
the ability to walk, even slowly.
thinking time.
Fresh fruits and vegetables.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Airplane Rides

I went on my first airplane trip when I was about 6 or 7.
My parents, my brother and I flew to Detroit to pick up a new car from the factory there and then we traveled around and drove it home.
My dad believed that this was the best way to buy a car.
The money he saved on shipping the car and paying a car dealer paid for the vacation.
But this blog is about airplanes, not cars.

I was very impressed with my first plane ride.
I can remember gazing out of the window of the airplane at all the tiny roads and tiny houses and tiny cars and tiny people. It reminded me of the Game of Life game board.
The stewardesses (which they were called at the time) treated me nice and I thought I was pretty special.
The only thing I didn't like was the cigarette smoke floating through the air. Back then you could smoke in certain rows toward the back of the plane but the smoke circulated everywhere.

Today I took another plane ride.
One of many I have taken since that first one.

I am still impressed with the view from the window.
The tiny roads and houses and cars.
The thing that intrigues me the most now though are all the designs in the fields and the ground - circles and lines and diamonds and squares. It's amazing to me how much definition there is in dirt and rocks and weeds.

The flight attendants are still nice, but I don't know that I feel all that special anymore. I guess I was special today because I got the whole row to myself which was definitely nice. I probably should wish for seatmates so I could have opportunities to share the gospel, but I enjoyed my peaceful, quiet trip.

One of the most intelligent people I know refuses to fly.
I haven't discussed his reasons with him but every time I get on an airplane I wonder if he knows something that I don't,
but should.
I have a hard time understanding how planes can fly.
I have had it all explained to me, the lift and the drag and the this and the that, and it still doesn't make sense to me that a big, huge airplane can be held up in the sky by only air.
It's something I don't really like to dwell on.
As long as I don't think about it too hard I'm o.k.
It appears to work pretty well, over and over again so I just have faith that it will work when I am a passenger as well.
Today that plan worked out well.
It is nice to be in Salt Lake City in an hour and a half
as opposed to 13 hours.

Today I am thankful for

Airplanes.
Money to pay for a plane ticket.
A flexible schedule that allows me to leave home whenever I need to or want to.

Be Specific when you Pray

Today the talks in Sacrament meeting
were about prayer and
receiving answers to prayers.
The speakers shared some personal experiences
about having their prayers answered.
This got me thinking about experiences
that I have had with prayer.

My favorite prayer memory took place
while I was on my mission in a town named Aylesbury.
My companion and I were knocking on doors one evening
and we weren't experiencing too much success.
We were having a hard time finding people at home,
or at least answering their doors.

I said a silent prayer,
"Please let the people at the next house open the door."
We knocked on the door and the door was opened
by a less than friendly bloke who quite quickly
let us know that he wasn't interested
in hearing what we had to say.
SLAM!

I offered another silent prayer.
"Please let the people at the next house talk to us."
We knocked on the door, the door was opened,
a nice lady spoke with us and
answered our "5 questions about happiness"
(which was our usual door approach)
but wasn't willing to let us come in
and share a message with her.

Another silent prayer.
"Please let the people at the next house let us come in."
We knocked, approached, were invited in to visit
but when we tried to teach that was the end of the visit.

Another prayer.
"Please let the people at the next house
let us come in and teach them the first discussion."
We knocked, were invited in, taught a discussion
but the home owners weren't interested in having us return.

Next Prayer.
"Please let the people in this house let us in,
let us teach, and let us come back."
That's just the way it happened.

That was the last house on the street
and it was time to go home by then
so I didn't advance to the the prayer
that ended up with "and let them get baptised".
At least not that night.
I did however learn a valuable lesson
in the importance of being specific when I pray.
You sometimes get just what you ask for.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

Sometimes I Feel Old

Sometimes I feel old.
Not a bad kind of old.
Just a this is not where I belong
kind of old.
Like tonight
I went out to dinner
to celebrate September birthdays
with my friends.
We went to the California Pizza Kitchen
at the Tempe Marketplace.
The restaurant was in an area
called the District
and I was definitely out of my age comfort zone.
I felt old
and a little fuddy-duddy
and I was perfectly o.k. with that.
Sometimes it's alright to feel old.

Tomorrow I'll go to Utah
to spend a week with my mother
on her retirement street
with her senior citizen friends
and I will feel young again.

Today I am thankful for

Good Friends to laugh with and to be serious with as well.
Daughters to do fun things with.
A husband that helps with the laundry.

Cake Decorating 101

A Mom and 2 Daughters.
A very large bag of powdered sugar to make 6 bowls of frosting.

4 cakes (one didn't survive being taken out of the pan, so the daughter had to make a new one).
Good balancing skills to get all the cakes, frosting, and supplies to the instructors house.
A little instruction and a lot of practice.

3 cute cakes.



4 fun hours spent with my daughters and a lot of leftover frosting.
Who's going to eat all this cake?
Too bad I can't.

Friday, September 12, 2008

Temple Trip


Today the oldest son and I
went to the temple.
The missing temple pants
and the forgotten tie
made the trip more of a challenge
but the forgotten tie resulted
in the found temple pants
which was an answer to my prayer.

Why does going to the temple
have to be so difficult sometimes?

This video on You Tube
made me realize that I don't have it
nearly as bad as some people do though.



I am so blessed to have a temple
only 10 minutes away from home
or 30 minutes if you have to take 2 trips.
As always the trip was well worth it.
I love the temple.

Today I am thankful for

A temple close to home.
A son that is worthy to go to the temple with me.
Answers to prayers.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Second Chances


Our Family was invited to join a few other families in the neighborhood for a Family Home Evening Service activity on Monday night. We shoveled and spread gravel in another neighbor's yard. My sons weren't exactly thrilled with the idea. They didn't appreciate their mom providing them with the opportunity to look outside themselves for a couple of hours. I am very grateful that they did it anyway, but I'm not sure they received the full blessings that were available for this good deed.

Luckily for them they were given another opportunity to earn blessings tonight when the Young Men in the ward got to go and finish the project that we had started on Monday. They even got to do it in the rain this time.

My sons might see this as double punishment but I see it as a loving Heavenly Father giving them a second chance to receive the blessings he so wants to give to them. I think I see a little sense of humor on His part as well.

I believe that there are certain things that each one of us, personally and collectively, need to learn while we are here on earth and I firmly believe that Heavenly Father will continue to give us opportunities to learn them until we get it right.

Heavenly Father believes in second chances (more if we need them) and I'm grateful. Whether those second chances come dressed up like an invitation to go to a movie with your friends, or a girlfriend's desire to share the Gospel or another temptation dropping out of cyperspace I hope we can recognize them for what they are. A second chance to get it right!

Today I am thankful for

Friends who encourage my family and I to give service.
Promptings from the Holy Ghost.
Rain.
Second Chances.

Mamma Mia

I have put off writting this post long enough.
I have something I know that I need to say
but I really don't want to say it.

I went to the movie Mamma Mia
for my birthday with my hubby.

I enjoyed it a lot.
It made me laugh hysterically.
It made me want to fly to Greece with my best friends.
It made me remember what it felt like to be 20 again.
It made me want to lose 100+ pounds
so I could don metallic pants and go-go boots
and dance
and wiggle more than waddle
and sing at the top of my lungs
and run up mountains
and jump on beds while doing the splits.
It made me feel good
and happy
and accepting of life.

I wish I could just accept entertainment
at face value
and be entertained
and leave it at that,
but I can't.

I have to think.

I have to look beyond the fun
and the laughs
and the light hearted moments
to the message that is being sent
in that feel good package
to what I am really being accepting of.

That 3 dads could possibly be better than 1.
That dot, dot, dotting with 3 boys in the same week,
none of whom you are married to, is awkward,
but not necessarily wrong.
That getting married at 20 is limiting and short-sighted
and it's much better to go explore the world with a boyfriend
than to settle down with a husband.
That men liking men is just a way of life.

Now, I will be the first to admit
that I went into this movie with my eyes wide open.
I knew from the previews the basis of the story
and I still wanted to see the movie
because it looked entertaining.

Sometimes I chose being entertained over
doing what I know is right.
What the Holy Ghost tells me is right.

I knew that the content of this movie,
while possibly not being explicit,
was not going to reflect my standards
and my values
and by beliefs.
I knew it before I went
and I went anyway
and I enjoyed it.
Except when I felt the spirit
pricking me in my heart.

I am disappointed in myself.

I read that 92% of the people who saw this movie
would recommend it to someone else.

If I recommended this movie
what would I be recommending?

The entertaining, possibly harmless parts
or the values that don't reflect my own?

My recommendation is
Go out and buy the CD,
Collect all your best friends,
Go to the beach and rent a villa
and sing and dance to your hearts content.
Oh and if you need to lose weight before
you can safely jumb on a bed
go ahead and do that too.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Food

Food has been on my mind a lot the past few days.

I suffer from Fibromyalgia.
It stinks.
I wouldn't wish this disease on my worst enemy.

Once in a while I get really tired of feeling yucky
and decide that I am going to be more proactive
and do something about it.
I start reading books and looking for possible solutions.
This usually leads to feeling worse instead of feeling better.
There are so many unknowns associated with this illness
and it affects people in many different ways.
Most of the suggestions in most of the books
end with the disclaimer -
this has been proven to help in
about 2% of the subjects who tried it.
2% isn't very high, but I guess if
I were in that 2% it would be worth it.

The past month I have been reading a book entitled
The Fibromyalgia Solution
by David Dyland.
A lot of what he has to say makes sense to me.
One of his opinions is that the symptoms of Fibromyalgia
are made worse by certain foods and food allergies.
His suggestion was to go on a 3 week elimination diet.
The idea is to eliminate ALL the foods
that might possibly be increasing the problem.
It's a pretty long list.

I decided that I needed to
at least put his theory to the test.
Of course I couldn't do it during my birthday month
so I decided to wait and begin
after my fast on September 7th.
I knew I was going to need all the help I could get
so beginning with a fast made sense to me.

For the next 3 weeks my diet consists of

Fresh Fruit - except citrus and strawberries
Dried Fruit - unsweetened in limited quantities
Fresh or Steamed Vegetables - except corn and peas
Chicken (not processed)
Turkey (not processed)
Fish (wild only not farm raised)
Nuts and Nut Butters - except peanuts
Seeds
Beans, Lentils and other Legumes
Wild or Brown Rice
Quinoa, Millet, Amaranth and Buckwheat
Rice or Almond Milk (w/o sugar)
Water
Vegetable Juice (except carrot)
Coconut, Palm or Olive Oil
Spices - except red and black pepper

Now, perhaps you can guess
that this is not the way I usually eat.
Where's the Diet Coke?
the Chocolate?
the Dairy Products?
the Bread?
the Red Meat?
the Oatmeal?
the Eggs?
Pretty much where's anything
that sounds remotely exciting?

This has been kind of hard for me.
I have dreamed about food the last two nights.
I have been having a bit of a
"poor me" attitude today.
Life is so hard and I can't even eat anything good.

I decided to clean out my e-mail box
to distract myself from wanting to eat.
While I was deleting messages after messages
(Let's get rid of chocolate and
unread messages all at the same time.)
I ran across this e-mail I received a while back
from one of my friends.
It really helped me to put things in perspective.

It's entitled a Week's Worth of Food

Germany: The Melander family of Bargteheide
Food expenditure for one week: 375.39 Euros or $500.07

United States: The Revis family of North Carolina
Food expenditure for one week $341.98

Italy : The Manzo family of Sicily
Food expenditure for one week: 214.36 Euros or $260.11

Mexico: The Casales family of Cuernavaca
Food expenditure for one week: 1,862.78 Mexican Pesos or $189.09

Poland: The Sobczynscy family of Konstancin-Jeziorna
Food expenditure for one week: 582.48 Zlotys or $151.27

Egypt: The Ahmed family of Cairo
Food expenditure for one week: 387.85 Egyptian Pounds or $68.53

Ecuador: The Ayme family of Tingo
Food expenditure for one week: $31.55

Bhutan: The Namgay family of S hi ng khey Village
Food expenditure for one week: 224.93 ngultrum o r $5.03

Chad: The Aboubakar family of Breidjing Camp
Food expenditure for one week: 685 CFA Francs or $1.23

All of the sudden all that food
I get to eat for the next 3 weeks
looks pretty darn good.

After 3 weeks I get to start
adding food groups back
one at a time.
If I don't have increased symptoms
after a couple of days
I can keep eating that group
and add another.
Some "food" groups are
suppose to never get added back.
I bet you can guess which ones.
Hmm,
I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

For now I'll just work on appreciating
what I have.

Today I am thankful for

an abundance of food.
Friends
who send me e-mails to remind me how blessed I am.
Possibilities.

The thing I learned today was the origin of the cliche "Going Cold Turkey" which means to quit something abruptly. This expression originates from the goose bumps and pallor which accompany withdrawal from narcotics or tobacco. One's skin resembles that of a plucked, cold turkey. I am feeling a bit cold.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Green Cash Money for my Opinions

Today a nice lady came to my house
and conducted a survey
on politics and other important issues of the day
and paid me $25.00
just for sharing my opinions.
I feel like I have a lot of opinions
but my opinions don't translate very well
into categories on a survey.
I don't want to just say
never, sometimes or always.
I want to share my Whole opinion.
The Why I feel that way.
After taking this survey though
I definitely decided I am a fence-sitter.
I hang out in the middle of the scale a lot.
It's not because I don't have an opinion
it's just that I can see how both sides feel
and why they feel that way.
I am easily swayed
or not totally sure which side
I agree with the most.

A few of the questions got me thinking though.

One of them was if I would vote for a black president
if Obama weren't that president.
Yes, I really think I would happily vote
for a president who was black
if I felt he were qualified for the job
and his beliefs were similair to mine.

Another one asked if I ever tried to live a less sinful life.
After I answered that one yes the next question asked
"Do you do this by focusing
on refraining from sinning
or on helping others?"
I answered refraining from sinning
but the more I thought about
this the more I wondered
if that is part of my problem in life.
I often feel that I am too focused on me
and need to be more focused on others.
While I am hunkered down in my house
valiantly trying to not do anything sinful
I could be out in the world
making a difference and helping others.
That's something I need to work on.

It was interesting to have to actually
verbalize some of my thoughts and feelings
concerning the current political hub-bub
and I was again reminded of the fact that
I should be a little more actively engaged
in educating myself on some of the issues.

Only 2 more months and
we will have to live with the choices we have made.

Today I am thankful

that I live in a free country where I can voice my opinions.
for $25.00 that I earned.
that there are people that actually want to be president of the United States.

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Exclusive Party

Tonight I attended an exclusive party.
At least that's what the sign outside Sunsplash said
when we arrived at my hubby's employee picnic tonight.

When I think of the word exclusive
I conjour up fancy clothes
and fancy food
and something extra special.
Now, I know that's not what the word exclusive means
but that is what I imagine.

Nope.

Not even close.

No fancy food -
however the hotdogs and hamburgers were
grilled to perfection and
the Chili Beans were actually hot this year.
I also enjoyed the unlimited Diet Pepsi.

Definitely no fancy clothes -
I have a hard time appreciating anyone
dressed in a swimming suit.
I just don't think they are all that flattering
on the majority of people and
I really can't imagine walking around in a bikini
in front of a huge crowd of people.
I saw enough exposed skin,
cracks and clevage,
and pot bellies to last me for a long, long time.

The Bingo Games
might have managed to be classified as extra special
if I had been a winner,
but unfortunately I wasn't even close.

This picture of the youngest shaking water
out of his hair is pretty special though.
At least the girls seem to be impressed.



Even though the party didn't live up
to the "exclusive" classification that it boasted.
It was still a fun outing with family and roomates
and I didn't have to cook dinner again!

I enjoyed watching my kids
happily spending time together.

If you were there I hope you enjoyed yourself as much as I did
and if you weren't I'm sorry you were excluded
which of course is the true definition of the word exclusive.

Today I am thankful for

Kids that like to do things with each other.
My husband's job and the perks that come with it.
Daughters to take classes with.

Today I learned that when you take a picture of a cup of ice with your flash on, the ice doesn't show up.

Friday, September 5, 2008

Friday Night Football


It's that time of the year again,
time for High School Football.
The men in my family are adamant
that they need to be in attendance
at every game.


They go under the guise of watching
the small one perform in the Marching Band
but I'm pretty sure that's not the only reason
they insist on attending.

I have to admit that I enjoy
watching high school sports as well.
Except when one of the teams
is losing by a lot and then
I start wanting to cheer for the underdog
even when it might not be the team
I'm suppose to cheer for.
Or when the score is really close
and then I feel bad that either team
has to lose.
Or when someone gets injured and
I worry about their future
and their mother's stress levels.

I guess I'm glad my sons
have just stuck with Marching Band.
It's a lot less stressful for me to watch
them on the football field
when they are carrying an instrument
and not wearing shoulder pads
with their uniform.


The game tonight was fun.
We drove through Scottsdale, Paradise Valley,
and an upper class part of Phoenix to get there
and I enjoyed the scenery.

It wasn't too hot,
especially once the sun went down
and there was even a "cool" breeze
every now and then.
I'm sure however those in uniform
might disagree with me on this point.

McClintock won by a lot but
Sunnyslope managed to score at the end
(due to me cheering them on I'm sure).
My hubby was quick to point out
that the score was against our second string
but I was happy that they scored.

Our friend, who is the quarterback,
did a great job on offense and defense
and he (or any of the other players)
didn't get hurt.

I do enjoy the game,
most of the time.
I do enjoy the ride across the valley
to away games,
most of the time.
I do enjoy just being outside,
most of the time.
I do enjoy listening to the band play,
most of the time.
I do enjoy listening to the people around me,
most of the time.
I do enjoy being with family and friends,
most of the time.
I do enjoy watching the cheerleaders,
every once in awhile.
I do enjoy not having to cook dinner,
all of the time.

So I guess I do like Friday Night Football,
most of the time.
At least I know what my boys and I
are doing on Friday nights
until at least November.

Welcome Football season!

Today I am thankful for

Sunrises and Sunsets - both of which I saw today thanks to marching band.
Subway - I like Subway!
The Scriptures.

Bible Reading

One of the things on my "to do" list
for this year is to read the Standard Works.

I hate to admit that I have never read
the Bible cover to cover.
I have read the entire New Testament
and I have tried to read the Old Testament
on numerous occasions,
but I quickly get bogged down in the begats
and the begetting
and the begots.

There are some kind of
iffy things that go on in the Old Testament
in those areas
and I am easily distracted by them.

However,
I believe the Bible to be the Word of God
As far as it is translated correctly
and I am determined to read it
even if it seems like,
in my opinion,
it could have been condensed,
a lot,
and not lost much.

Recently I read the Bible Cliff Notes,
an extremely condensed version of the Bible.

The Bible in Fifty Words

God made
Adam bit
Noah arked
Abraham split
Joseph ruled
Jacob fooled
Bush talked
Moses balked
Pharaoh plagued
People walked
Sea divided
Tablets guided
Promise landed
Saul freaked
David peeked
Prophets warned
Jesus born
God walked
Love talked
Anger crucified
Hope died
Love rose
Spirit flamed
Word spread
God remained.

- Unknown

Although I think that might
hit on most of the highlights of the Bible,
and I've already read about the first 6
in the book of Genesis,
I will continue to plug along
and read the entire King James version.

I recently heard that the Old Testament
was written to testify of the Messiah—Jesus Christ—
who was known to the ancients as Jehovah.
I am trying to focus on this idea
as I do my reading
and looking for references to Jesus Christ
or symbolism that alludes to him.

I really don't want to just read the Bible
to be able to say that I have done it.

I want to read the Bible
to learn what it contains,
from my Heavenly Father
that he wants me,
personally,
to know
and to increase my testimony of Jesus Christ.

That thought makes me almost excited
to start Exodus tomorrow.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Things aren't always the way we Think they are

This morning I was
reading an article
in the September Issue
of the Ensign Magazine
entitled "Toothpaste on the Mirror".

It was about a couple
who had been married for a lot of years
and during their time together
the wife had found a few things
that her spouse did that irritated her.
One of the little annoyances
was how her husband managed to
splatter toothpaste on the mirror
each and every time he brushed his teeth.
She found herself repeatedly
reminding him to be more careful
or to clean up after himself.

Then came the day after
her husband passed away.

She wiped the toothpaste off the mirror
one last time.

However, the next day
there the splatters were again
and again the next
and again.

She began to realize
that her husband wasn't the only one
with the bad habit
of splattering toothpaste on the mirror.

How often in life
are things not the way we think they are?

How often in life
do we place the blame on the wrong person?

How often in life
do we ignore our failings and focus on everyone else's?

How often in life
should we stop and think again?

How often in life do we do it?

Today I am thankful for

Forgiveness, again. Someday I'm going to get this being the mom thing right.
Kids that are big enough to take care of themselves.
Boys that know when it's a good idea to take a shower.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Political Promises















Today were the primary elections in our neighborhood. Our polling place was so close I could have walked if I had chosen to.

Last night the hubby made reminder calls to all of the kids about the election for a new council member on the reservation. They are lucky enough to vote in two elections!

This morning the voting age son was complaining that he didn't want to drive to the res to vote after work. It was too far. It was too hard.Blah, blah, blah. I reminded him of all the financial perks the tribe offers him and said that having to vote once in a while wasn't a hard pay back. (Well, that and getting summoned for jury duty about once a month. It doesn't always pay to be one of the community members with a clean police record. We get a lot of jury summons in our family.) His reply was "they don't have to drive to my house to deliver my percap check." Such a logical child.

After he left for work I started thinking that maybe the tribe should only give percap checks to those community members who made the effort to vote. They'd either get a much higher voter turnout or have lots of left over money to use for more projects. Or maybe they could pass it on to the voters. What a great idea!

This got me thinking about other elections.

Why isn't voting required?

Why is it only an option?

What do you think would happen if we were all forced to vote? Everyone over 18 rounded up every election day and escorted to the polls (at least we'd be able to find them that way).

Would this be a positive thing? Probably much better voter turnout than the measly 20% that they were reporting today.

The more I thought about it though the more I started thinking maybe this wasn't such a good idea. I think being forced to vote would probably end up bad. Some individuals would be voting for people they knew nothing about, or for issues that looked good on the surface but really weren't when you dug deeper, or randomly drawing black lines just to complete the voting process that was required.

But wait! Isn't that what is happening now in some cases?

Every time I vote, I leave the polls vowing that I will come a little better prepared the next time and then the next time comes and I still manage to see names on the ballot that I really don't recognize or don't know enough about.

Shame on me!

I need to appreciate the opportunity that I have to vote a little bit more. Just think of those countries where people actually put themselves in harm's way in order to be able to cast their vote and have a say in their government or have no say at all.
I promise to appreciate the opportunity that I have to vote a little bit more.

I need to get a little bit more excited about voting. At the presidential primary earlier this year there was a young lady there who had just turned 18 and was able to vote for the very first time. She was so Excited. She was dancing and yelling and celebrating big time.
I promise to get a little bit more excited about voting. (Like not count voting as my thing I really didn't want to do today, but did anyway.)

I need to do my homework a little bit better before I vote. Perhaps I could start by reading all the fliers that come in the mail before I throw them away or do a little research of my own on the computer.
I promise to do my homework a little bit better before I vote.

There you have it -
more political promises
that I promise to keep.

Today I am thankful

that I was born in the United States of America.
for a husband that washes dishes when it's his turn.
Grocery Stores where I can purchase just about anything I could ever want.

The new thing I learned today is that it is important to know which political party the candidates you plan on voting for belong to, at least in the primary election.

Monday, September 1, 2008

Holiday Breakfast at IHOP

Once upon a time
on some patriotic national holiday
our family went out to breakfast
at IHOP.
The restaurant was decorated
with Red, White and Blue banners
and flags and stars
and pictures of
all of the presidents of the United States.

It was a long time ago.
I'm pretty sure the last picture
on display was President Clinton.

Our family had very little money,
and we didn't eat out often
so this was something unusual
and fun to do.
Our children were still pretty young,
could probably eat off of the kids menu,
and we had also discovered that
eating out for breakfast
was cheaper than eating out
for lunch or dinner.
The kids were very excited.
This was a splurge
but it was worth it and
we all enjoyed ourselves.

Since that time
any patriotic national holiday that arrives
one of our children (usually the eldest son)
insists that this is the national holiday
when we go out to breakfast
to celebrate.
Every once in a while we agree
and we go.

Things have changed in our household.
We have a little more discretionary money
and children who are no longer young.
Some that no longer live at home,
and some that have money of their own.
Eating out in our family is unfortunately
no longer an unusual occurrence.
It happens way too often,
but if it means I don't have to cook
or listen to family members complain
about my meal choices
I am more than willing to succumb
to the pressure and eat out.

A couple of days ago Son #1 said
"Are we going out to breakfast
on Labor Day?
You know it's a family tradition."
Well, although we eat out often
and had just been out
for my birthday when he asked,
I thought, "You know, we haven't been
out for breakfast in a while.
I'll surprise him and say yes."

My plan was that the hubby and I
and the two children
that reside in our home
would go to IHOP for breakfast.
It would be fun and
and somewhat within our budget.

The boys wouldn't have it.
It is a FAMILY tradition
and the girls should be invited.
I was under the impression that
the oldest daughter was involved
in a family reunion with her in-laws
for the entire Labor Day weekend
so I said she should not be invited.
I didn't want her to feel left out.

We picked up Daughter #2
and went to IHOP.
We squished into a booth
and were being a cozy family
enjoying a family tradition of sorts.
The daughter asks if her sister was invited.
I explain that she is reunioning with the hubby.
Time passes as the boys entertain themselves
throwing straw wrappers at each other
and we chit chat.
The daughter comments,
"The reunion ended yesterday.
She is very upset that
SHE wasn't invited to our FAMILY outing."

Don't you love cell phones
and text messaging
and being able to communicate
where ever and when ever you need to.
Even during a FAMILY breakfast and
especially when it's an
opportunity to get your mother in trouble
with one of your siblings,
which seems to be #1 on my kids list
of fun things to do this week.

Whoops!
That's strike #2
on my good mom chart
in the past couple of days
with the eldest.
She is already convinced that
I said she was my Stupidest child
thanks to child #4.
Which in my own defense
I did not say or even think.
I'm in even more trouble
with her now.

Why is it that sometimes
when we do things with
the best of intentions
they seem to backfire
and blow up in our face?

Happy Holiday at IHOP.

Today I am thankful for

Forgiveness.
3 day weekends
where you have time to have fun and accomplish stuff too.
Individuals who have been an influence for good in the lives of my children. Thank you Bro. Stewart.

The new thing I learned today was when your son tells you he is going to let his sister cut his hair you should try harder to discourage him, even though you are pretty sure he isn't going to listen to you , because when it turns out bad, in his opinion, you are going to be the one who gets the blame. Also you should always make sure to ask if picture day at school is coming up any time soon.