The Long Way to Where We Want to Be

Yesterday the oldest daughter, the youngest son and I took an outing to IKEA where I needed to look for some picture frames for a church project.   Despite the rush hour congestion and about 10 necessary apologies of "Sorry, I'm from out of town" as I cut across 3 lanes of traffic numerous times, we arrived at the store safely.

When we returned to the car for the journey back to the hospital it was beginning to get dark and the traffic was still heavy.  The oldest daughter was pretty sure she knew how to get us back and so we started on our way.

We were following the road signs that directed us to get in a certain lane for the road we wanted, but when we actually got to where we met up with that road, we were not where we needed to be and we ended up going north instead of south.

Despite the son's insistence that we were lost, we weren't too worried.  We knew where we wanted to go and knew how to get there.  We would just travel north, take the next exit, turn back around and head south.

The next exit was quite a ways down the road.  Just as we started to exit we realized that we could only travel east on the road from this ramp.  To go west we should have stayed on the freeway a few more yards.

That was OK.  We would just turn around when we got a chance, head west and get back on the freeway headed south.  We could do this, it would add a couple of minutes to our trip, but we were still fine.

We found a place to turn around and were once again going the right way.  I moved into the left lane to get back on the freeway, feeling pretty good about how things were going, and sailed past the freeway entrance that someone decided should be on the right instead of the left.

Not a big deal.  We could just turn left, take the surface streets back to the "G-named street" and get on the freeway there and that's just what we did.

Once again we were headed in the right direction.  The son put on some calming music (it took a few tries, but we finally agreed on what was calming), the daughter passed me a Lindt chocolate,  I took a deep breath and down the road we went.

Now it was really dark and the traffic was still heavy.  I was a little nervous driving the unfamiliar road but the daughter knew where we were going and we were confident that we would get there,  a little later than expected, but most likely in one piece in spite of the youngest son's views on my driving skills.

A handful and a half of wrong turns, missed exits, one way streets, differing ideas and mis-interpreted road signs later we finally reached our destination.  Our pizza for dinner was cold, our nerves were a little frazzled, but we were where we wanted to be.

This long-winded story perfectly describes my thoughts and feelings about this cancer journey we are on at the moment.

There is a plan.

There is a time table.

We all know where we want to end up and have a pretty good idea how to get there.

However,  sometimes the road is dark, and unfamiliar and even a little scary.

The path is filled with contradictory voices, lots of back seat drivers, detours, one way streets, hard to remember street names and surprising turns.

Sometimes we feel like we are headed in the wrong direction and we probably are.

Some may even insist that all is lost,
but I have faith that eventually we will reach our destination safe and sound.

It just may take a little longer than we would like and I think I'm going to need a whole lot of chocolate.

Today I am thankful that

Shad was able to move from the PICU to the regular pediatric ward. This is a positive sign and a step toward going home, plus his room is a lot bigger and at least one parent gets an actual bed to sleep in.

a by-the-book doctor let her heart be soften by a cute smile and brought Shad a whole take out container full of pickles from the galley for his hospital hamburger.  Whoever thought serving zucchini that resembled pickles and a pickle-less hamburger for lunch today is not a nice person.

At first glance these may look like pickles, but they are NOT pickles!

You'll be happy to know that he ate a few bites of hamburger with all those pickles.  

today's ultra sound technician seemed to know what he was doing and managed to do his job with as little trauma as possible to the grandson.

the youngest son bought pizza for dinner.

A Happy Hmm...

On our way to California today we kept passing the same semi with this loaded on the back.

Every single time I saw it, it made me smile
and smiling felt good.
I'm sure you can figure out what it looks like.
I wonder what it really is?

P.S. The youngest son thinks I'm weird.

Wordy Gratitude List

Today I am thankful for

a son who feels and follows promptings that help keep him safe. The youngest son was driving home from school after he had dropped a friend off. He usually goes out onto a main road from this house to travel home, but today he had a feeling that he should go a different way. As he was driving past our church the car started blowing really hot air and suddenly died so he coasted into the church parking lot, parked the car and assessed the situation. He couldn't get the car to start so he called me and I went and got him. A few days ago a woman's car stalled on the freeway and before she could get out of traffic she was rear ended, her car burst into flames and she was killed. The son was sure he would have ended up the same way if he had been on a busy road. I'm not sure that the situation was that dire, but I'm glad he acted upon his feelings and that all turned out well -for him at least. We're still not sure what is wrong with the car.
happy surprises at the grocery store. Today I went to Safeway to buy some groceries. Cheese was one of the items on my list because they had their 2 lb blocks on sale for $4.49. When I got to the dairy department some of the cheese had a .30 cent coupon on the package. I was happy because that made them even a better deal. When I checked out they quadrupled the coupon to $1.00. 2 lbs of cheese for $3.49. Happy day!
one woman who works really hard so a lot of women can have fun being crafty together. There is a sister in our ward who loves to make wooden crafts so she has taken it upon herself to plan a monthly Relief Society Craft project. She cuts all the wood herself and collects all the supplies for us so all we have to do is show up, pay our money (cost of materials only) and create. She is also very willing to accommodate all of the out-of-the ward daughters who want to come with their mothers. It is always a fun evening. Tonight we painted, papered and decorated letters to spell the word LOVE. The sister's husband came home toward the end of the evening and announced that he was going to tell all his buddies in the High Priest's Quorum on Sunday that a whole bunch of Relief Society women came to his house this week and made love.

If the Stake President hears about this our craft nights might be a thing of the past.

The Sexy Beast Gets His Driver's License

The youngest son has been after me all evening to blog about the exciting happening in his life today. I told him I was still trying to come up with a fitting title and he immediately told me what my post should be called. Apparently when the son looks in the mirror 100 times a day he sees the reflection of a sexy beast, but the official driver's license just says his name. I do have to say that his new picture more closely resembles a sexy beast than the old one did. He's changed a lot since he was 15 and 7 months.

I'm not sure why they passed him though. It's obvious from this photo that he was clearly driving the wrong way through this parking lot.


Today I am grateful for

a husband who took half a day off of work to take the son to the MVD. He should have never told me he had to use up some of his leave time.
the woman who gave me her coupon in the grocery store line and saved me a dollar on my toilet paper. I think she felt bad for making me stand in line behind her for 20 minutes while they worked on her WIC transactions.
a daughter who washes dishes without complaining.

Photo Radar

Photo Radar seems to be a hot and controversial topic in Arizona. We have had photo radar on one stretch of freeway as well as at numerous traffic lights throughout the valley for several years. In the past year they have put in a lot more cameras on the freeways and have put up speed cameras on city streets. There are certain intersections and streets that are almost constantly putting on a light show with all the flashes that go off.

There are many Arizonians who hate photo radar. They say it is illegal. They say it is an invasion of privacy. They say the way the tickets are served makes them invalid. At Christmas time someone dressed up like Santa and covered many of the cameras on the freeway with cardboard boxes. Not too long ago a man working in a photo radar van was shot and killed by a disgruntled member of the community. Lucky for the police the camera took his picture and they were able to catch him.

Now, I will be the first to admit that I don't always observe the speed limit. I have received more than one speeding ticket in my lifetime. I don't usually speed because I am in a hurry. I speed because I am easily distracted and forget to notice how fast I am actually going or what the current speed limit actually is. I do try to be a law abiding citizen. With that said, I really don't have a problem with photo radar. I think if I am breaking the law then I deserve to face the consequences of my behavior. I don't feel that it makes any difference whether I was caught by a camera or an actual person. Do I like to get speeding tickets? Of course not. Do I like paying close to $200 to go to traffic school so the points won't go on my record? Not at all. I think that most of the people who complain about photo radar are just whiny babies who don't like to be held accountable for their actions. It bugs me that so many individuals find ways and make excuses to get out of having to pay the tickets they have received.
Perhaps you have figured out by now what this blog is leading up to. Someone in our family got a photo radar ticket recently and we received the picture in the mail today.

I like the way they bubbled me and the son out of the picture (just in case that wasn't his wife that was riding in the passenger seat). Plus, it made a great spot for me to add a caption.

In the hubby's defense, the spot where he got flashed the speed limit is 35 and it seems like a dumb place for it to be that low. I have driven past this spot when it felt like I was in the middle of an electrical storm there were so many pictures being taken. However, he is willing to accept the consequence of his action regardless.

Today I am grateful that

the youngest son's report card was better than expected. At least he passed all his classes. (He lucked out that it arrived in the mailbox on the same day his dad's speeding ticket got here. That took a little pressure off of him.)
I wasn't the one who got the speeding ticket this time.
I am willing to accept consequences for my actions without too much whining (most of the time) and that my husband is too.

One year ago today - Fun with the Ladies, Lunch in a Truck.

The Deal

We have a problem in our family with the kind of words we use and the tone of voice we speak with. It has gotten to the point where pretty much at least half of the stuff that comes out of my mouth or my son's mouths seems to be sarcastic, facetious, unkind, impolite, contentious or just plan mean. I have been thinking for a while that we need to do something to change this, but I wasn't really sure how to help us stop. Today while the youngest son and I were waiting for his last (hopefully) visit with the oral surgeon he made a smart remark and I said, "I think you should see if you can go for a whole week without being sarcastic." His response was "What will you give me?" I told him I would kiss him on the forehead. That definitely wasn't going to cut it. "Will you buy me a car?" "Uh, No." "Will you let me get my driver's license?" "Nope." "If I go for a month without being sarcastic will you let me get my license?" I had to think about this one for a minute. First of all, the way things are in our home at the moment I would say the chances of him going for a month without being sarcastic are less than zero. Probably like a negative 50 at least. And that is not being sarcastic. That is the genuine truth. However, I could really enjoy an entire month of honest, polite responses coming out of this son's mouth. I was thinking it might actually be worth it. I wasn't going to give in too easily though so I upped the ante. "If you can go for a month without saying anything sarcastic, rude, or mean to any member of our family I will let you get your license." "This is going to be easy!" He was immediately checking his calendar in his phone to figure out what day of the week April 23rd was and entering a note that he was getting his driver's license on that day.
On the way home we stopped at Circle K so I could buy the son an ICEE in honor of his one year anniversary of giving up soda. He hasn't intentionally drunk any type of carbonated beverage since March 23, 2008. (He was tricked into drinking soda when he partook of the wedding punch at his sister's wedding reception last April before he was informed that one of the main ingredients happened to be 7up.) He went into the store to make his purchase and I waited in the car. When he came out I remarked "You smell like coffee. Have you been drinking coffee?" He quickly retorted, "All day, every day." I looked at him and he whacked himself on the knee. He pulled out his phone and changed his note. "On Friday, April 24 on I going to get my driver's license." Since then he has done quite well and I am thoroughly enjoying this welcome break from his wicked words. Now I just need to work on myself and his brother. Stay tuned to see how this episode of "Let's Make a Deal" turns out.

Today I am thankful for

a visiting teaching companion that makes the appointments.
a son that took out the trash without complaining and even gathered up the palm tree litter left by last night's windstorm without even being asked.
a husband that goes to the grocery store.
the last trip to the oral surgeon (I hope).

Power Restored

Today after the ENT appointment
the son and I went to the DMV
to get him another permit.
We tried out a different DMV
than we usually frequent
since this one on Greenfield Road in Mesa
was very close to the doctor's office.
Although the lines didn't seem
to move any faster at this location
than any of the others I have visited
the people did seem to be competent
and even somewhat friendly and helpful.

The small one only missed one question
on his test and is now the proud owner
of his 3rd learner's permit.
Hopefully someday he'll score as well
on his school exams
and will actually get to possess
a full fledged Driver's License.

As the boy walked out to the van
with the keys in his hand
and the permit in his wallet
he exclaimed, "I feel so powerful."
I'm glad that being in the driver's seat
can do that for him.

Canyon Colors

My mom kept telling me that I needed to do something fun before I went home. She seems to think that all I have done while I was here is work. I don't feel like I have worked very hard. I have done my fair share of laundry and I have cooked a few meals, but I'm not sure that constitutes hard work. The washing machine basically does the work for me and cooking isn't bad at all when the recipients are appreciative.

Since today'was my last day in Utah I had to decide what fun thing I wanted to do. I chose to go on an Autumn leave hunt up the canyon. My mom and my sister decided they could handle that much fun so they accompanied me. My hunt was sucessful and I had lots of fun!

These leaves were just as we entered Payson canyon, pretty close to home. More evidence that Fall is quickly approaching.

This picture was taken from the trailhead to the Grotto, where our family went hiking when we were in Utah this summer. I didn't do any hiking, but I did get out to take a few pictures. We were all surprised that the quaking Aspens, at the top of the mountain, were all still green. There were a lot more colored leaves down lower than there were up high.

My mom has a Fall screen saver on her computer with beautiful yellow trees lining both sides of the road and piles of yellow leaves on the ground. I told her that that was what I was looking for before we left home. These leaves weren't quite as abundant as the ones on her computer, but it was still a very pretty scene. I took this picture in Santaquin Canyon on the way down.

It's a good thing I wasn't trying to do any real hunting on this drive. The deer kept disappearing before I could get my camera situated to "shoot" them. I could have picked off a lot of grazing cows, but I don't think their owners would have appreciated that too much.

I loved being able to actually see Autumn leaves for a change. It was a beautiful and fun trip, much better than cooking or doing laundry.

Today I am thankful for

the time I have been able to spend with my mom and other family members for the past 10 days.
my mom's recovery - even though it is progressing slower than she would like.
people that appreciate my cooking.

My Son's First Driving Casualty

My 16 year old was involved in a hit and run today. The worst part was, I was in the car with him at the time and I didn't even realize that it had happened. It wasn't until we got to our house that I realized something was even wrong. We quickly returned to the scene. But it was too late for the victim. Parts of her were strewn all over the asphalt. My son attempted to resuscitate her, but she was too far gone. Even his magic fixing skill was not enough. Sally the Cell Phone is no more. At least we don't have to report this accident to the insurance company. I guess I know what I want for my birthday now! Today I am thankful for cooler temperatures and RAIN. for washing machines. I wouldn't want to wash clothes with a rock and a bar of soap. that the driving casualty was a cell phone and not a car or a person. My birthmonth present today was not having to drive anyone to or from work. All the cars kept running for another day. Keep your fingers crossed.

Home again, Home again

This morning I sat on my mom's front porch, one last time, enjoying the cool morning breeze while I waited for my family to get ready to head for home. I'm afraid that I'm not going to be that cool again for a long, long time. Last night the boys were all for leaving for Arizona at 3:00 AM, but today they had a hard time getting out of couch or off the floor, as the case may be. We finally got everything loaded up and were headed out about 8:30 AM Utah time, which was only 7:30 AM Arizona time, so not too bad. It's always hard for me to say good bye to my mom and this morning my sister was there too so that made it even harder. I always feel like I am going to miss out on something fun when I leave. My mom was probably waiting for the front door to close so she could start singing the Hallelujah Chorus. I'm sure it is a relief to get rid of all the company and get back to her quiet life. (However today we left just in time for my sister, brother-in-law, their 2 sons, 1 wife and 4 kids to arrive. No peace and quiet yet!) The newlyweds headed north, and then east, to Colorado to visit with the son-in-law's grandparents while we headed south toward home. It was another uneventful trip, which I was grateful for. The sons decided that maybe if they took control of the driving we would make better time so the oldest one even drove the stretch from Hurricane to Flagstaff and the hubby and I lounged in the backseat watching a movie and a couple of episodes of Walker, Texas Ranger. I have to admit, the time did seem to go a lot faster. We made pretty good time and arrived home about 7:00 PM, following a stop at Cafe Rumba in Glendale for my favorite Tropical Chicken Salad. The salad was good, but not as absolutely delicious as I remember. Perhaps the fact that I had been snacking all day made the difference. I just wasn't hungry enough to fully appreciate it. The cat-feeding, house-watching, nursery-teaching daughter and her roommates/son's girlfriend and her puppy welcomed us with much enthusiasm. I think Poky was the most excited. She had to share all her toys with us that she had hidden under the chair. However, the girlfriend also seemed happy and the other 2 girls were enthusiastic about the Rumba salads we delivered to them. The daughter had bought "welcome home cake" and we celebrated together after the hubby spent 30 minutes on the phone with Qwest getting the internet fixed. They talked him through the steps and although he didn't follow all of their instructions to the letter it is now working again. Hopefully for a LONG time. I guess it is good to be home. I just which I could figure out a way to not let the extreme heat get me down. As we were driving into Maricopa county things started looking like home and I do like living here, but honestly - which would you choose??? Actually, the 61 degrees was while we were enjoying a brief rainstorm in Flagstaff. When we left Payson it was 68 degrees, so technically if I want to be cool I only have to move 2 and a half hours north and not 12 hours north, but then I wouldn't be by any family. The past week Phoenix has had below normal temperatures (low hundreds) but now we're home and they're going up! Less than 4 months more of 100+ temperatures and then I'll remember why I live in Tempe. We have beautiful winters! Tonight I am grateful for A mom - who lets my family and me invade her home so we can have a vacation. A welcoming committee - who made us feel missed and loved. An uneventful trip - Those are the very best kind to have.

Salt Lake Valley for the day

This morning we got up and went to the Jordan River temple. The daughter and I and our hubbies did a session and the sons did baptisms. It was nice to be back in the temple where our family got it's beginning. A lot has happened since my husband and I tied the knot there 25 years ago. It is fun to see my daughter now in about the same place I was then - a newlywed just starting out with the next 25 years still to be experienced. New beginnings are always so exciting and also a little scary. I hope the temple plays an important role in her next 25 years. It's a great place to ponder the whole picture and focus on the eternal perspective rather than the day to day trials. It was a wonderful morning. We met my sister and her roommate for a lunch treat at Cafe Rio. I enjoyed the Pork Barbacoa Salad a lot. It is one of my favorites. Then we took a scenic trip north across the valley past the new Oquirrh Temple (not sure of its actual name) that is under construction and to a store I had been wanting to visit. It was called Market Square (I think) and it wasn't quite as exciting as I had hoped it would be but now I can say I've been there and won't have to feel bad for missing out on something fun. The most exciting part was trying to find it. I was in my sister's car with her and my family was following behind in our van. They were pretty sure we had no idea where we were going and they were right. Then we headed east to another part of the city to locate Ye Olde Dutch Store for the son-in-law. He served his mission in the Netherlands and wanted to pick up some of his Dutch favorites. Once again the exciting part was in the trip and not the destination, but once we figured out it wasn't really called "Ye Olde" it was a lot easier to locate in the phone book and get the actual address. Our next stop was suppose to be to find out if there is still a Snelgrove's Ice Cream Parlor in Salt Lake but after 3 failed attempts to find an open road going under the I-80 we gave up on that adventure and just headed back to my sister's house. We drove really slowly past the Deseret Industries to make my family nervous, but we didn't stop. We did manage one more stop at the Deseret Book Bookcellar Outlet store on Redwood Rd. in South Jordan. This is a must on any trip we take to Utah. I love church books and when I can get them for a bargain, I love them even more. I bought several fiction books for $1.99, a Dowdle puzzle of San Diego for $1.49 (I could do it at the beach next year if I were going back), and quite a few music CDs for $1.99. It was the highlight of the day for me -after the temple of course. We hadn't taken enough scenic routes during the day so we decided to go back to Payson past the Draper temple (which is also under construction, but further along than the Oquirrh one) and over the mountain to Highland. It was a fun and exciting route and we saw lots of big houses and dedicated bike riders pedalling up hill. It was a fun day. I am grateful for a sister - who is willing to buy me and my family lunch and drive me all over tarnation too. Temples - where I can go to remember why I am here on earth. Daylight - until 9:00 at night so I can see all the scenery on my scenic trips.

Side trip to Mexico - almost

Heading home to Arizona we had 5 people in one of the ladies Nissan truck. The youngest daughter suffers from car sickness so she ended up in the front passenger seat - the navigator spot. After filling the truck up with gas at $4.49 a gallon we were all a little sticker shocked and apparently not thinking as clearly as we normally would have. We headed down the road making all the right turns, or so we thought. We were all talking and/or reading and traveling along at a steady pace. On the freeway they have signs that tell you how many minutes it will take you to get to certain locations. We passed one that said 17 minutes to the Mexican border. I commented on how strange it was to be so close to a foreign country and how weird that seemed to me since I have never been to Mexico. It was hard for me to believe it was just down the road. Well, low and behold, about 17 minutes later guess what wasn't nearly as far down the road as it should have been? We noticed the international border signs at about the same time the navigator pointed out the LAST US EXIT rapidly approaching on our far right. With some quick and "completely safe and legal" maneuvering on our driver's part we were able to reach the exit and be saved from having to wait in a very long line just to explain that all we really wanted to do was get to Arizona and could we please just turn around. I wanted to get out and take a picture of the Mexican flag waving in front of us, but our driver felt that we had already spent enough time on our sight seeing adventure and wouldn't even stop, so this picture will have to suffice. This is pretty much what it looked like. After we got headed in the right direction and were finally on the road we really wanted to be on we began to wonder what we were thinking. We probably could have found the daughter a very willing husband there at the border and taken him home with us right then. We considered turning around and going back, but for only a second. The rest of the trip seemed highly uneventful after our exciting beginning and with only about 105 potty stops, give or take 100, we arrived back home to the blistering heat of Tempe, AZ. I would say that I am already looking forward to next year's trip, but who knows what next year will bring?