Today the hubby and I have been married for 26 years and guess what we did tonight to commemorate the occasion? Well, I went to Relief Society Enrichment night with my oldest daughter and the hubby finished up his home teaching with our youngest son. When I found out that Enrichment night was on our anniversary I was a little sad. It seems like getting together with my sisters in the Relief Society is such a rare occurrence anymore. I don't get to meet with them in Relief Society on Sunday and our ward seems to be a little light on having mid week activities. I really miss monthly enrichment meetings and the opportunity to socialize with the women in my ward (although I definitely don't miss planning those meetings and then executing the plan on a monthly basis). I asked my oldest son if it was wrong of me to want to go to Enrichment rather than to go out with my sweetheart. He seemed to be appalled that I would even consider the idea, but the more I thought about it, the more I really wanted to attend Enrichment. I discussed it with the hubby and he said whatever I wanted to do would be fine. He made the decision a little easier when he inadvertently scheduled a home teaching appointment on that night as well. I am pretty sure that I may be weird, but having my husband and son fulfill their home teaching responsibilities means a lot more to me than going out to dinner to celebrate my anniversary. One of the reasons I fell in love with my husband,way back when, was because I strongly believed that he was the kind of man who could get me and my children back to live with our Heavenly Father again some day. When I see him serving the Lord by serving others and magnifying his church callings I am reminded of why I married him in the first place. Oh, and by the way, I believe that I made the right decision 26 years ago and tonight as well.
Today I am thankful for
a husband who still loves me after 26 years.
the ability to look at the eternal perspective of life.
my Relief Society sisters.
One year ago today - Poopy little Poky, 25 years!
Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marriage. Show all posts
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Friday, February 27, 2009
Road Block
The oldest son's wedding has hit a road block.
The road block is not really a surprise.
We have been aware that it existed for a while now.
There have been warning signs flashing
along the road as we have moved toward our destination.
Every now and then we have even caught a glimpse of it
off in the distance and wondered
if there would come a time when it
might impede our forward progress.
Road workers were consulted
and they predicted that most likely,
with caution and some help
from an experienced road crew,
it could be navigated around.
That's why most of us were a little taken by surprise
when today we got right next to the road block
and discovered it's actual size.
What had appeared to be rather small and manageable
from a few miles away
now appears quite massive and a little scary.
And the hardest part of all
is that while many of us can stand here
and offer support and suggestions
the heavy duty road block removal
has fallen on the tiny shoulders of the fiancee.
It is her road block to conquer.
At the moment she's not sure if she is up to the task.
The road block appears huge
and she is so small.
She has known for a long time that this road block
was going to have to be approached
and dealt with at some point in her journey
but now that she is face to face with it
she doesn't have a clue how to make a dent
in this gigantic mountain before her.
She is feeling overwhelmed and discouraged.
It seems like it would be easier to just give up.
Perhaps turn around and take a different route,
but now that she has acknowledged the road block
it seems to stop her progess
no matter which direction she turns.
She is stuck.
I hope she can realize
that she doesn't really have to remove
this road block all by herself.
Her loving Savior, Jesus Christ,
is an expert at getting rid of
seemingly insurmountable obstacles
and he is waiting right there
ready and willing to help
as soon as she asks.
We, on the other hand,
are just waiting
and praying.
The road block is not really a surprise.
We have been aware that it existed for a while now.
There have been warning signs flashing
along the road as we have moved toward our destination.
Every now and then we have even caught a glimpse of it
off in the distance and wondered
if there would come a time when it
might impede our forward progress.
Road workers were consulted
and they predicted that most likely,
with caution and some help
from an experienced road crew,
it could be navigated around.
That's why most of us were a little taken by surprise
when today we got right next to the road block
and discovered it's actual size.
What had appeared to be rather small and manageable
from a few miles away
now appears quite massive and a little scary.
And the hardest part of all
is that while many of us can stand here
and offer support and suggestions
the heavy duty road block removal
has fallen on the tiny shoulders of the fiancee.
It is her road block to conquer.
At the moment she's not sure if she is up to the task.
The road block appears huge
and she is so small.
She has known for a long time that this road block
was going to have to be approached
and dealt with at some point in her journey
but now that she is face to face with it
she doesn't have a clue how to make a dent
in this gigantic mountain before her.
She is feeling overwhelmed and discouraged.
It seems like it would be easier to just give up.
Perhaps turn around and take a different route,
but now that she has acknowledged the road block
it seems to stop her progess
no matter which direction she turns.
She is stuck.
I hope she can realize
that she doesn't really have to remove
this road block all by herself.
Her loving Savior, Jesus Christ,
is an expert at getting rid of
seemingly insurmountable obstacles
and he is waiting right there
ready and willing to help
as soon as she asks.
We, on the other hand,
are just waiting
and praying.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Life Isn't Always Fair
My oldest daughter has always had a very strong desire for fairness in life. I'm sure I couldn't count the number of times while she was growing up that she spoke the phrase "That's not fair." and I would unsympathetically reply, "Life isn't always fair." I do believe that first born children often have to deal with more unfairness in life than other children. They are the oldest and therefore are sometimes held up as the example, have to live up to high expectations, have to carry more than their fair share of the work, have to be the guinea pigs for parenting attempts that backfire, are expected to act the oldest in disputes... While I understand and often join in her desire for fairness, I am also willing to acknowledge that sometimes life just isn't fair and that's just the way it is and that's really not necessarily a bad thing.
This daughter has recently been experiencing one of the joys of married life - deciding which family to spend the holidays with. How are we, as a married couple, going to make both families happy and how are we going to divide our time fairly? The son-in-law's immediate family live here in the valley, which in many cases makes life easier and in a few cases, harder. This year their family is spending Thanksgiving with a sister in Gallup, New Mexico. They want the newlyweds to go with them. This has been a topic of much thought, discussion and consideration. If the couple spends Thanksgiving with his family then the fair thing to do would be to spend Christmas with her family. However, when you consider that his family lives "in the neighborhood" it seems somewhat selfish on the wife's part to tell the husband "you don't get to see your family on Christmas." especially considering that he has a missionary brother who only gets to call home on Christmas and Mother's Day. It wouldn't really be fair for him to have to miss his brother's phone call if it were possible for him to be there. This is one of those situations where life really can't be fair, or where you have to rethink, "What is fair?"
I think sometimes fair doesn't translate into splitting things right down the middle. If you have a 16 year old boy and a 1 year old boy a fair division of a cookie might not be a 50/50 split. The needs and the stomach size of the 2 boys are different. This is why life doesn't always seem fair. The 1 year old might rightly feel that he hasn't gotten his fair share if he is given less than half of the cookie. When we take into consideration all the varying circumstances and needs of the individuals involved, often the truly fair solution might seem to favor one person more than the other. Next time it just might favor the other person.
I love my daughter and my son-in-law. I want to spend time with them whenever I can and I especially like to be with my daughter on the holidays, but I also understand that given the circumstances the fair solution might not fall in my favor. I might not get my entire half of the cookie this time. I am OK with that fact.
I like to believe that in the end we will all look back and see that life really was fair for each one of us in a very personal way. That our loving Heavenly Father looked at each one of His children's needs and tried to always deal with us fairly without taking away our agency or the agency of any of His other children. When we die I think that we will realize that life was much fairer than we ever imagined at the time.
However, when grandchildren are added to the equation I might not feel as noble and generous as I do today. I'm giving the other grandparents fair warning.
This daughter has recently been experiencing one of the joys of married life - deciding which family to spend the holidays with. How are we, as a married couple, going to make both families happy and how are we going to divide our time fairly? The son-in-law's immediate family live here in the valley, which in many cases makes life easier and in a few cases, harder. This year their family is spending Thanksgiving with a sister in Gallup, New Mexico. They want the newlyweds to go with them. This has been a topic of much thought, discussion and consideration. If the couple spends Thanksgiving with his family then the fair thing to do would be to spend Christmas with her family. However, when you consider that his family lives "in the neighborhood" it seems somewhat selfish on the wife's part to tell the husband "you don't get to see your family on Christmas." especially considering that he has a missionary brother who only gets to call home on Christmas and Mother's Day. It wouldn't really be fair for him to have to miss his brother's phone call if it were possible for him to be there. This is one of those situations where life really can't be fair, or where you have to rethink, "What is fair?"
I think sometimes fair doesn't translate into splitting things right down the middle. If you have a 16 year old boy and a 1 year old boy a fair division of a cookie might not be a 50/50 split. The needs and the stomach size of the 2 boys are different. This is why life doesn't always seem fair. The 1 year old might rightly feel that he hasn't gotten his fair share if he is given less than half of the cookie. When we take into consideration all the varying circumstances and needs of the individuals involved, often the truly fair solution might seem to favor one person more than the other. Next time it just might favor the other person.
I love my daughter and my son-in-law. I want to spend time with them whenever I can and I especially like to be with my daughter on the holidays, but I also understand that given the circumstances the fair solution might not fall in my favor. I might not get my entire half of the cookie this time. I am OK with that fact.
I like to believe that in the end we will all look back and see that life really was fair for each one of us in a very personal way. That our loving Heavenly Father looked at each one of His children's needs and tried to always deal with us fairly without taking away our agency or the agency of any of His other children. When we die I think that we will realize that life was much fairer than we ever imagined at the time.
However, when grandchildren are added to the equation I might not feel as noble and generous as I do today. I'm giving the other grandparents fair warning.
Monday, November 17, 2008
Distractions
I am a person that is easily distracted from accomplishing what I set out to do. Sometimes my Blog is my distraction and sometimes other people's Blogs distract me from mine and sometimes just turning on the computer distracts me from everything.
I have become very distracted this past week by the aftermath of the vote on Proposition 8 in California - Protests outside Mormon temples, church member's jobs, homes, and businesses being threatened, white powder being mailed to several different religious buildings... I was caught off guard by all that has been happening. It is hard for me to comprehend what has been taking place following a decision made in a democratic election. A statement issued by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints says "People of faith have been intimidated for simply exercising their democratic rights. These are not actions that are worthy of the democratic ideals of our nation. The end of a free and fair election should not be the beginning of a hostile response in America." I don't understand why political officials in California aren't willing to stand up for the majority of the people they represent and acknowledge that this decision is the will of the people and affirm that they will uphold it. I try to picture the individuals in favor of Prop 8 behaving in a similar fashion if the final tally had gone the other direction and not in our favor. I can't even imagine it.
I think because I find some of these events so incomprehensible, I keep being drawn to more and more information about them hoping in someway to make sense of the whole thing. I have wasted a lot of time reading articles and news reports about all that is transpiring and still I simply don't understand. As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints I am sure that part of the issue is that I don't like to see the Church that I belong to and believe in reflected in a negative light, especially when I don't feel that we are the ones that have done anything negative. Also, in the back of my mind I keep feeling grateful that California is where this issue has come to a head and not Arizona (following the passing of Proposition 102) and then being disappointed in myself because of those feelings. I worry, "when will it be my turn to have to stand in the face of dangerous and demoralizing opposition and courageously maintain my position?" I am frightened by the visibility of Satan and his plan going forward in today's America.
Since this issue has been foremost in my mind recently, I thought it was appropriate when I opened to Elder Robert D. Hales conference talk to read in the Ensign today. It is entitled Christian Courage: The Price of Discipleship. It amazes me over and over again how inspired our leaders are in the messages they prepare and share with us. I may have been surprised by what happened in California following the election there, but obviously the leaders of the church, both here on earth and in the heavens above, were not surprised at all. This talk brought me the peace and understanding that I have been searching for in so many ways. God knows what is going on. "The opposition which may seem hard to bear will be a blessing to the Kingdom of God upon the earth." "When we do not retaliate - when we turn the other cheek and resist feelings of anger - we stand with the Savior. We show forth His love, which is the only power that can subdue the adversary and answer our accusers without accusing them in return." However, the message that struck me with the most power was this, "We have a great work to do, which will not be accomplished if we allow ourselves to stop and argue and be distracted. Instead we should muster Christian courage and move on. As we read in Psalms 37:1 'Fret not thyself because of evildoers'."
There is Heavenly Father's message to me. Don't let this distract you. Move away from the computer and go and do what needs to be done.
With that said I guess I better sign out.
I find it ironic that since November, the month to be thankful, started I have been very remiss in writing down what I am grateful for every day. Writing these things down is a very important part of my life and makes a big difference in my daily attitude. I need to step it up again.
Today I am thankful for
Inspired leaders who receive revelation concerning topics to speak on in General Conference and pass that inspiration on to me.
Family Time.
Times when things just seem to work out right. Today the youngest son and I both got to be happy with a trip to the church.
I have become very distracted this past week by the aftermath of the vote on Proposition 8 in California - Protests outside Mormon temples, church member's jobs, homes, and businesses being threatened, white powder being mailed to several different religious buildings... I was caught off guard by all that has been happening. It is hard for me to comprehend what has been taking place following a decision made in a democratic election. A statement issued by the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints says "People of faith have been intimidated for simply exercising their democratic rights. These are not actions that are worthy of the democratic ideals of our nation. The end of a free and fair election should not be the beginning of a hostile response in America." I don't understand why political officials in California aren't willing to stand up for the majority of the people they represent and acknowledge that this decision is the will of the people and affirm that they will uphold it. I try to picture the individuals in favor of Prop 8 behaving in a similar fashion if the final tally had gone the other direction and not in our favor. I can't even imagine it.
I think because I find some of these events so incomprehensible, I keep being drawn to more and more information about them hoping in someway to make sense of the whole thing. I have wasted a lot of time reading articles and news reports about all that is transpiring and still I simply don't understand. As a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints I am sure that part of the issue is that I don't like to see the Church that I belong to and believe in reflected in a negative light, especially when I don't feel that we are the ones that have done anything negative. Also, in the back of my mind I keep feeling grateful that California is where this issue has come to a head and not Arizona (following the passing of Proposition 102) and then being disappointed in myself because of those feelings. I worry, "when will it be my turn to have to stand in the face of dangerous and demoralizing opposition and courageously maintain my position?" I am frightened by the visibility of Satan and his plan going forward in today's America.
Since this issue has been foremost in my mind recently, I thought it was appropriate when I opened to Elder Robert D. Hales conference talk to read in the Ensign today. It is entitled Christian Courage: The Price of Discipleship. It amazes me over and over again how inspired our leaders are in the messages they prepare and share with us. I may have been surprised by what happened in California following the election there, but obviously the leaders of the church, both here on earth and in the heavens above, were not surprised at all. This talk brought me the peace and understanding that I have been searching for in so many ways. God knows what is going on. "The opposition which may seem hard to bear will be a blessing to the Kingdom of God upon the earth." "When we do not retaliate - when we turn the other cheek and resist feelings of anger - we stand with the Savior. We show forth His love, which is the only power that can subdue the adversary and answer our accusers without accusing them in return." However, the message that struck me with the most power was this, "We have a great work to do, which will not be accomplished if we allow ourselves to stop and argue and be distracted. Instead we should muster Christian courage and move on. As we read in Psalms 37:1 'Fret not thyself because of evildoers'."
There is Heavenly Father's message to me. Don't let this distract you. Move away from the computer and go and do what needs to be done.
With that said I guess I better sign out.
I find it ironic that since November, the month to be thankful, started I have been very remiss in writing down what I am grateful for every day. Writing these things down is a very important part of my life and makes a big difference in my daily attitude. I need to step it up again.
Today I am thankful for
Inspired leaders who receive revelation concerning topics to speak on in General Conference and pass that inspiration on to me.
Family Time.
Times when things just seem to work out right. Today the youngest son and I both got to be happy with a trip to the church.
Wednesday, September 3, 2008
Things aren't always the way we Think they are
This morning I was
reading an article
in the September Issue
of the Ensign Magazine
entitled "Toothpaste on the Mirror".
It was about a couple
who had been married for a lot of years
and during their time together
the wife had found a few things
that her spouse did that irritated her.
One of the little annoyances
was how her husband managed to
splatter toothpaste on the mirror
each and every time he brushed his teeth.
She found herself repeatedly
reminding him to be more careful
or to clean up after himself.
Then came the day after
her husband passed away.
She wiped the toothpaste off the mirror
one last time.
However, the next day
there the splatters were again
and again the next
and again.
She began to realize
that her husband wasn't the only one
with the bad habit
of splattering toothpaste on the mirror.
How often in life
are things not the way we think they are?
How often in life
do we place the blame on the wrong person?
How often in life
do we ignore our failings and focus on everyone else's?
How often in life
should we stop and think again?
How often in life do we do it?
Today I am thankful for
Forgiveness, again. Someday I'm going to get this being the mom thing right.
Kids that are big enough to take care of themselves.
Boys that know when it's a good idea to take a shower.
reading an article
in the September Issue
of the Ensign Magazine
entitled "Toothpaste on the Mirror".
It was about a couple
who had been married for a lot of years
and during their time together
the wife had found a few things
that her spouse did that irritated her.
One of the little annoyances
was how her husband managed to
splatter toothpaste on the mirror
each and every time he brushed his teeth.
She found herself repeatedly
reminding him to be more careful
or to clean up after himself.
Then came the day after
her husband passed away.
She wiped the toothpaste off the mirror
one last time.
However, the next day
there the splatters were again
and again the next
and again.
She began to realize
that her husband wasn't the only one
with the bad habit
of splattering toothpaste on the mirror.
How often in life
are things not the way we think they are?
How often in life
do we place the blame on the wrong person?
How often in life
do we ignore our failings and focus on everyone else's?
How often in life
should we stop and think again?
How often in life do we do it?
Today I am thankful for
Forgiveness, again. Someday I'm going to get this being the mom thing right.
Kids that are big enough to take care of themselves.
Boys that know when it's a good idea to take a shower.
Monday, June 23, 2008
25 years!
Today the hubby and I are celebrating 25 years of marital bliss. I guess we would both say that there have been a few days interspersed here and there that weren't so blissful, but for the most part it has been a pretty wonderful ride. Marriage isn't easy but I don't think anything that is worth a lot ever is. Marriage takes work and attention. It is easy to loose sight of how important our marriage is and sometimes we let it get pushed to the back burner. Earlier this year, we took a class offered by the stake that reminded us to put our relationship first and foremost. It was amazing how quickly our marriage improved when we were focusing on it every day. I am glad that I fell in love with him 25 years ago and I would marry him again in a minute. I love you my handsome husband. It's hard to believe that I have been married for more years than I was single.
Our kids made us a delicious dinner of steak, twice-baked potatoes, fruit salad and brownies and ice cream. They surprized us with dinner a few years ago when it was our anniversary and I loved the idea of them all working together and getting along while they accomplished a common goal. When we were trying to decide what to do this year I requested dinner, made by them, again. They are good kids and are four of the reasons why I'm glad I married their dad.
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